BIG JOHN

Did you hear about this? John Travolta is being sued by a masseur. The masseur claims Travolta picked HIM up for a massage appointment, drove him to a hotel and tried to have sex with him. Travolta groped him and masturbated openly in his presence. I hope he was at least a good fucking tipper. Hey John, everybody knows your gay, just come out of the fucking closet. I can hear Travolta's explanation already I was reaching for a towel when I accidentally touched his penis with my mouth. Im just shocked George Clooney wasn't involved..... Maurice Sendak died, you know the guy who wrote Where The Wild Things Are. I would like to know the shit he was on while writing these books. Look he made it to 83, it was a good run but 84 was just not in the cards. Wow, the CIA thwarted another bomb plot. This was a new and improved bomb that when shoved up your ass cannot be detected. I don't know but isn't shoving things up your ass forbidden by Allah. Well guess what? the guy ( Ahmed al-Quso ) that was the mastermind has been dispatched by one of our bombs that does not require being shoved up someones ass. I guess he won't be making bombs anymore because he is splattered all over Yemen. Rangers beat the Capitals in OT, enuf said. The yankees are looking to get swept into last place starting tonight against Tampa Bay. I don't know what is a worse place, Tampa Bay or the Bronx. This might surprise you but I am going with Tampa Bay. It appears the Red Sox want to remain firmly entrenched in last place. Listen Sox fans if Clemens beats the rap maybe he will make a come back. The only other suggestion I have is ask Curt Schilling to change his socks and suit up. It won't be long till you start hearing crickets at Fenway or is that the sound of the place falling apart.