OPENING DAY AND MORE SHIT

There will be no crime in the Bronx today, The Yankees play their home opener. Heavy police presence and an influx of causasians wearing backward Yankee caps will be the reasons for the reduction. However, crime in Greenwich, CT. will be on the rise because the criminals that were in the Bronx will now go to Greenwich because all that yuppie scum will be at the Yankee game. Mariano Rivera will celebrate his 90th birthday. Hey Mariano, get the fuck out. Angel 5 Yankees who knows. The N Y Met season comes to an end this weekend, one good thing you don't have to wait till August. Talking about teams that will be in last place all year, the Red Sox have a firm grip on that spot,unfortunately alcoholism in Boston will be on the rise. There has to be some hidden reason why Bobby V. decided to manage this team. Does Boston have a large Japanese community? Rangers beat the Senators,tell me when the rangers get to the finals and i will then turn on my tv. Two of the worse cities in the U.S. are battling it out in the NHL playoffs. Lets start with Pittsburgh, this city makes West, VA. look like a tropical paradise, what a shit hole. Pittsburghs claim to fame is a roach infested eatery called Primanti's, they make a sandwich on stale bread that contains shit and then top it off with french fries, YUMMY. These tootless morons are playing the Flyers. ( Bet you didn't see this coming ). OH yes, the city of brotherly love. Flyers fans make the Philly fans look like aristocrats. You can always spot a flyer fan, they carry signs that read " Will Work For Flyer Tickets ". I guess it could be worse, they could be playing in Harrisburg. A sharpshooting retired NYPD lieutenant gunned down a gun toting criminal that robbed a Harlem Pharmacy. It don't get better than that. One less piece of garbage on the streets of New York. Hey No. Korea, if your going to launch a missile make sure the fucking thing can get off the ground. what a bunch of PANT LOADS. Hey I got an idea, why don't you feed your own people. Here is my suggestion. We should launch some missiles at No Korea to show them how a nuclear warhead really works. KABOOM