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The N Y Metropolitans celebrate their 50th Anniversary today. Who names a team the Metropolitans? Ralph Kiner will be the starting pitcher and Roger Craig will come in the game after Ralph throws 2 pitches. Craig will throw two or three pitches and Nolan Ryan will finish the game. The point I am trying to make is that the Mets SUCK. David Wright broke his pickie finger while sipping an espresso, Jason Bay will kill another Met rally with his 3rd strike out of the day, Ike Davis will break out in sweats from valley fever and Lucas Duda will drop every ball hit to right field. Right field is aptly named the MO Zone, not because of Modells but for Mo Vaughn. Thats the only place Vaughn could hit the ball. This team should be named the N.Y. Mess. The Jackson 4 are going on tour. You know why it is the Jackson 4? because number 5 is dead. Guess who won't be their opening act? Whitney Houston. Amy Whitehouse respectfully declined due to a death in the family, HERS. Al Pacino and Christopher Walken are filming a movie together called " Stand up Guys" I need more cow bell. The Car Show ends this Sunday at the Javits Center. I suggest you stay home, any parts worth taking were stolen on opening day. Rep. Charlie ( The Tax Cheat ) Rangel is running for another term despite a bad back. He blames the bad back on a suitcase he picked up stuffed with hundred dollars bills. This old fool is running for his 22nd term. Charlie, GET OUT. Guess who won't be President? Rick Santorum, the people in Pennsylvania won't even vote for him. I believe it is because they don't know how to operate the lever on the voting booth. Bobby Petrino was fired as coach for the Arizona Razorbacks for knowingly misleading the university. Well if thats the case everybody on Wall Street should be fired. ( Do you have to think about that ) Knicks lost to the Bulls, enuf said.